The Ultimate Teeth Uglifier: Spinach Soup!

Soup demands to be tasted at all steps of the process.
There's no doubt about it: besides blue lollipops, spinach will give you about the most hideous-looking mouth of any food out there. Lots of stringy green pieces of awesomeness stuck between teeth that look like green hair. Yeah, well, you get the idea. So, in a moment of sheer brilliance (probably mixed with a good dose of idiocy), I said to myself:
"A soup is a food with lots of other kinds of food floating around in it. Floaty swirly food gets stuck in your teeth easier than other less floaty and swirly kinds of food. Spinach is really tasty. And it gets stuck in your teeth really easily anyways. Let's put spinach into a soup!"

Okay, that wasn't my exact thought pattern, but you get the general idea. Mainly I thought about doing it because we needed an appetizer before our Thanksgiving Ish-Meal, and I happen to love spinach. I also married a spinach-lover, so that made it even better that I wasn't cooking an entire pot of soup just for myself!

Anyways, we come back around again to COMS (Cream of Mushroom Soup), the good old standby favorite of mine. COMS once again is the base for this soup.

You will need:
1 bag of frozen diced spinach (it's less than a buck at Kroger)
6-7 medium to large mushrooms
1 large onion
A lot of butter
Sour cream
1 large can of Cream of Mushroom Soup
Cayenne pepper (if you've got it)
Regular pepper

Start by chopping the onion and frying it with the frozen spinach on medium heat in butter in a large pot. You'll need lots of butter for this part, since the spinach (and eventually the mushrooms too) tend to soak up so much. Add the mushrooms when the onions and spinach are almost done and let the whole mixture fry for a couple minutes. Add enough salt to almost make the mixture taste too salty, since you will be adding so much other stuff to it.

When the mixture is done enough, add the entire can of soup and stir immediately to keep it from sticking to the bottom of the pot. A large scoop or two of sour cream can go in at this point, and you will want to stir the whole mixture well. Add as much milk as needed to bring it to the desired thickness and stir well again. Let it sit for a couple minutes to allow the whole thing to heat up, since the milk is cold. Stir every minute or two.
Once the whole soup is hot, add both kinds of pepper and stir well. Serve with some kind of white cheese (if available) and a touch of sage (again, if available.)

And now enjoy the sight of your recently brushed teeth becoming foulishly gummed up with nature's greenest vegetable! Tasty!

Enjoy! -- Nick


  1. I have most of these ingredients, maybe I'll try to whip it up!


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